I am currently enjoying a lovely summers break in the west country. Gorgeous scenery and fantastic weather combined with the delights of good country home cooking (all organic home grown veg and locally raised meat mmm!!). I am staying with friends who are innocent and unaware of my ‘secret’ London adventures and apart from getting so horny on occasion that I have found myself considering whether it might be possible to actually fuck a cucumber plant – yes – perverse I know but it was growing some extremely attractively shaped vegetables I am doing quite well on the ‘Miss Innocent’ stakes.
That was until a recent trip to the seaside. Picture a gorgeous sunny day, hot with blue, blue skies and fluffy little clouds, the sea lapping at your feet … what could be more perfect than a lovely cold ice lolly as you stroll along the coast? Well ice lolly in hand I took in the views and put the worlds to rights with my friends, but the damn thing started to drip! Without a seconds thought I stuck the whole lolly down my throat in order to lick the drips from the bottom! From the shocked expression on my friends faces I realised that this was not normal behaviour at all …. from now on I will be licking my lolly’s much more demurely!