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My Secret Life

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When I originally discovered that the Independent ran a regular article in their Sunday magazine entitled ‘My Secret Life’ I was enraged and assumed that a journalist had stolen my nickname; further investigation proved that it had been around for far longer than I had, so I have kept quiet until now. However, I thought it might be fun to answer their standard questions…
My parents are… Fairly eccentric, rather like their daughter! My father was delighted by the mad cow disease scare because it drastically brought down the price of beef, we ate a lot of beef! He later stock piled tins of beef to feed his entire family in case of a bird flu epidemic. It was, he said an act of love, to be able to feed his family in troubled times. My mother eventually managed to persuade him to reduce his hoard. I wouldn’t be surprised if he doesn’t still have some hidden away somewhere though.
My Mother was rather horrified by blatant sexuality and found and threw away the best erotic porn stash that I have ever owned. I still mourn/miss it!
The household I grew up in… always had a cat, sometimes hamsters and the occasional fair ground goldfish which tended to live for as long as it had taken to win it. Thinking about it in hindsight, I hope they don’t still give away goldfish as prizes it’s rather cruel.
Oh and I had two sisters too, who are both rather lovely and two of my closest friends.
When I was a child I wanted to be…  A Mermaid. (Yes, really!)
You wouldn’t know it but I am very good at… People management, the one thing I really miss about being singularly self employed is recruiting, managing and supporting a team for the greater good.
You may not know it but I’m no good at… Sewing. Thank god for dry cleaners! And my sister, much loved for her button sewing skills!
I wish I had never worn… Shell suits! But it was the 80’s, everybody wore them… until we discovered just how flammable they were! Thankfully I never wore mine on bonfire night.
My favourite item of clothing.. Is my grey satin basque, it is beautiful and I feel beautiful in it.
My house is… very modern and as uncluttered as possible. It’s in a great area of London close to the river and I feel very lucky to live here.
A book that changed me… The Pearl by Anonymous; a very rude book of victorian erotica which shaped my sexuality at the tender age of twelve.
My secret crush… is Jimmy Carr, I was working as a bar assistant during the Edinburgh Festival just before he got really famous. I was bar tending during one of his shows and his frequent jokes about anal sex made me think that we’d get on very well in bed! I made him coffee once… now there’s my claim to fame!
My real-life villains… Are highly judgemental people – they divide our world and cause so much unnecessary suffering. Strong people don’t put others down, they lift them up.
The last time I cried… Was when I found out that Father Christmas only cums once a year, it’s very sad….He should come to see me! I bet he’d love my Christmas stockings!
Ok. Very Bad Joke, I’ll stop now!
My five-year plan… I love what I do so I’m hoping to be here in five years time, still doing the same thing, loving life, having fun and sharing it with other people.
What’s the point? I really think that having fun is the key to life and I feel very lucky to be able to share that with others.
My life in six words… Fun, Naughty, Adventurous, Lucky and Well Lived.
A life in brief Charlotte grew up in London in the 1980’s and was highly driven by her sex drive from her very early teens. She lost her virginity to a German tourist in his hotel room in Covent Garden when she was fifteen.
She was disappointed by the act at first but was later seduced by an older neighbour who taught her many filthy things and sent her on a journey of sexual exploration. Thankfully she seduced and later fell in love with an older man at the age of sixteen which kept her out of mischief until she was twenty one.
From there she went on to explore BDSM, group sex and porn before another long term relationship rendered her relatively innocent. When that relationship ended she returned to the adult industry as an independent escort in her late twenties, specialising in the girl friend experience which she enjoyed so much that she gave up her day job in order to give it her full energy and attention; and still very much enjoys to this day.
She has had many other professional roles; previous jobs have included accountancy, project management, various management roles within charities and the NHS and massage therapy… which she still practices; only with a very naughty twist….. 😉

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