My Sexy Secret Life

Brilliant news xxxx

After a careful review of the World Health Organisation’s Coronavirus guidelines l have ordered a HAZMET suit and plan to return to escorting early next week!

Please scroll down for further details.












Sorry, l just couldn’t resist! “HAPPY APRIL FOOLS DAY!” Xxxxxxxx

My Sexy Secret Life

Stay the fuck at home…

I don’t know whether or not you’ve come across the “go the fuck to sleep” book, a tongue in cheek tale for new parents but if you haven’t it’s definitely worth a google – a lot of celebs have done brilliant voice overs for it! And l bet it embodies how a lot of “locked down” parents are feeling right now, poor loves. Anyway, this clip is one of many ‘Coronavirus’ adaptations which are currently doing the rounds…

Thinking of you! Stay well. Xxxxx


My Sexy Secret Life

Tips On Self Isolating By A Submariner

All content below was found on a recently published post on Twitter.

“During my time in the Submarine Service, I – along with many others – endured many weeks and months cooped up in a steel tube under the waves. I just thought I’d share a few coping strategies for many of you now facing a Covid-19 “patrol”.

ROUTINE: Life at sea is dictated by shifts and routines. You can tell what day it was by what was for dinner.Make a routine now, test it then write it down & stick to it. Divide your day up in to work (if home working) rest, exercise, meals, hobbies, etc. Do the same for kids.

PRIVACY: the only place private at sea was your bunk. Make a dedicated private time / place in the routine. Even if you timeshare the front room get everyone a couple of hours alone. Do whatever you want: watch shit films, pray, yoga, arrange matches: whatever gets you through.

EAT: scran onboard was usually pretty good and broke up the monotony of patrols. Take time to prepare meals. A good mix of “feast & famine” will stop the pounds piling on – one boat dis Steak Saturdays, Fishy Friday, Curry & Pizza nights. On other days soup & bread was enough.

EXERCISE: you’ll have the advantage of not having to use a spinning bike in a switchboard. 20-30mins a day of whatever as a minimum. Fitness Blender on YouTube has workouts for all. It’s a natural antidepressant, breaks up the day and keeps you healthy. Get outside when able.

CLEAN: that house is going to get grungy now you’re spending a lot more time in it. Put time in your daily routine to clean and stick to it.

CONNECT: even during radio silence we still got a weekly telegram from loved ones back home. This was a weekly highlight. Keep in touch with your people. My current work have agreed a daily “coffee” catch up online even if there’s no work to discuss.

PERSPECTIVE: like all other patrols, this one will end. It’s a shit sandwich but better than dodging barrel bombs. Don’t obsess the news or Twitter shit. Bring your world closer, focus on little things that you enjoy & make plans for the future. At least you should have a window!”