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New Years Resolutions

My Resolutions Pocket Notebook Set With Gold Foil

I don’t do the whole New Years Resolutions, New Lifestyle thing. January is a grey, cold, horrible month and making it harder seems a tad cruel to onself. I prefer to make my big changes in the Spring when the flowers start poking their heads out of the ground – by the time I see daffodils I’m postively exultant!

Anyway if I find myself getting a little of the January blues I do things which always make me feel better – I take a Vitamin D supplement and count my blessings by practicising gratitude. The diet and new exercise program will start in March and I’m looking forward to them – but for now what I’m most grateful for is all the lovely people that come and share my bed, sex also makes me feel very happy 🙂

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Anal Sex Diet

January, for many people is all about diets …I have my own tried and tested diet which I use all year round for one specific activity – anal sex 🙂
People often ask me what my special diet is – it’s basically no fibre … which lets me indulge my love for heinz cream of chicken soup! Not a good thing to eat for days on end but for a few days here and there it’s almost as much a a treat as the anal sex itself!! 🙂

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Sex on Wheels

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I’ve just watched a brilliant programme about disabled people having sex, mostly with escorts (including the lovely Laura Lee) starring some very, very sexy disabled people.

http://www.channel4.com/programmes/sex-on-wheels/4od

It reminded me of a very sexy, disabled East Londoner who kissed and fucked me with such raw passion it drove me crazy; we spent a wonderful no holes barred session in bed that I will never forget. 🙂

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Charlotte the Anal Virginity Slayer

I am immensely grateful that I am one of the extremely lucky few human beings out there who can honestly say that hand on heart, I truly have found my vocation. There is so much I love about being a whore; the self employment,the flexible hours, getting to live in Central London not to mention the sex!! I’m hoping that I never ever have to go back to an office; unless it’s to bend over a desk 😉

While I do love anal sex, one thing I never expected was to be entrusted with the delicate matter of taking so many men’s anal sex virginity! And it’s so very lovely how so many are very concerned about hurting me… Personally I think that anal sex will always hurt me at first but with lube and gentle perseverance it’s definitely worth the effort! (No pain, no gain as they say).

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It is a deep honour for me to bend over and offer my ass hole to my lovely anal virgins, it makes me smile to think of all the gentlemen who have let me be their first and I very much hope that they enjoyed it just as much as I know I did!

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It’s that time of year again….. xxx

Yes, indeed it was my Birthday yesterday; Oooh 33 how did that happen? Well of course, I know how it happened really, but it’s just come around so fast and I haven’t grown up yet, perhaps I should have done by now?

For example; I find this very funny! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S6M7i2mfMlU which is surely a sign of immaturity!?

Although, I would say I am much better in bed than I was in my early twenties now that I’m in my early  thirties (at 33 can I still claim to be early thirties?). Anyway I had a nice time with my nearest and dearest with more celebrations to come; I have also just had my first good seeing to as a 33 year old. Thank you.. you know who you are!

Although I’m actually a Tuesday’s child, I do love this David Bowie video about getting older: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rV29uzF_RSg (sorry about the sub titles, I think this video has been officaily pulled but there’s still this copy!) personally I think they were both hot when they were younger but even hotter when they were older!

So now that the somewhat dreaded birthday has been and gone what next does this month have in store? Valentines day…. I’m not a big fan to be honest. However; I have secured a dinner date with one of London’s top naughty ladies; Dollymopp and I’m looking forward to taking sneaky glances at her cleaverage somewhere candlelit and romantic; although being very good friends we won’t be going to bed together, it could spoil things.

Thankfully before our ‘date’ I have a gorgeous toy boy to play with, so as Valentines Days go, I think this one is going to be pretty damn fine. I even got a Valentines Day card (Thanks Mum, I do recognise your hand writing you know… I used to copy it all the time when I was at school, I used it for all the fake sick notes that I created to cover for all the times that I’d found a naughty boy to play with when I should have been studying!). Luckily all my naughty ‘studying’ came in handy in the end!

Anyway… one last thing to say; here’s wishing you a Very Happy Valentines Day XxXxXxXx

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BKPoHgKcqag

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My Secret Life

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When I originally discovered that the Independent ran a regular article in their Sunday magazine entitled ‘My Secret Life’ I was enraged and assumed that a journalist had stolen my nickname; further investigation proved that it had been around for far longer than I had, so I have kept quiet until now. However, I thought it might be fun to answer their standard questions…
My parents are… Fairly eccentric, rather like their daughter! My father was delighted by the mad cow disease scare because it drastically brought down the price of beef, we ate a lot of beef! He later stock piled tins of beef to feed his entire family in case of a bird flu epidemic. It was, he said an act of love, to be able to feed his family in troubled times. My mother eventually managed to persuade him to reduce his hoard. I wouldn’t be surprised if he doesn’t still have some hidden away somewhere though.
My Mother was rather horrified by blatant sexuality and found and threw away the best erotic porn stash that I have ever owned. I still mourn/miss it!
The household I grew up in… always had a cat, sometimes hamsters and the occasional fair ground goldfish which tended to live for as long as it had taken to win it. Thinking about it in hindsight, I hope they don’t still give away goldfish as prizes it’s rather cruel.
Oh and I had two sisters too, who are both rather lovely and two of my closest friends.
When I was a child I wanted to be…  A Mermaid. (Yes, really!)
You wouldn’t know it but I am very good at… People management, the one thing I really miss about being singularly self employed is recruiting, managing and supporting a team for the greater good.
You may not know it but I’m no good at… Sewing. Thank god for dry cleaners! And my sister, much loved for her button sewing skills!
I wish I had never worn… Shell suits! But it was the 80’s, everybody wore them… until we discovered just how flammable they were! Thankfully I never wore mine on bonfire night.
My favourite item of clothing.. Is my grey satin basque, it is beautiful and I feel beautiful in it.
My house is… very modern and as uncluttered as possible. It’s in a great area of London close to the river and I feel very lucky to live here.
A book that changed me… The Pearl by Anonymous; a very rude book of victorian erotica which shaped my sexuality at the tender age of twelve.
My secret crush… is Jimmy Carr, I was working as a bar assistant during the Edinburgh Festival just before he got really famous. I was bar tending during one of his shows and his frequent jokes about anal sex made me think that we’d get on very well in bed! I made him coffee once… now there’s my claim to fame!
My real-life villains… Are highly judgemental people – they divide our world and cause so much unnecessary suffering. Strong people don’t put others down, they lift them up.
The last time I cried… Was when I found out that Father Christmas only cums once a year, it’s very sad….He should come to see me! I bet he’d love my Christmas stockings!
Ok. Very Bad Joke, I’ll stop now!
My five-year plan… I love what I do so I’m hoping to be here in five years time, still doing the same thing, loving life, having fun and sharing it with other people.
What’s the point? I really think that having fun is the key to life and I feel very lucky to be able to share that with others.
My life in six words… Fun, Naughty, Adventurous, Lucky and Well Lived.
A life in brief Charlotte grew up in London in the 1980’s and was highly driven by her sex drive from her very early teens. She lost her virginity to a German tourist in his hotel room in Covent Garden when she was fifteen.
She was disappointed by the act at first but was later seduced by an older neighbour who taught her many filthy things and sent her on a journey of sexual exploration. Thankfully she seduced and later fell in love with an older man at the age of sixteen which kept her out of mischief until she was twenty one.
From there she went on to explore BDSM, group sex and porn before another long term relationship rendered her relatively innocent. When that relationship ended she returned to the adult industry as an independent escort in her late twenties, specialising in the girl friend experience which she enjoyed so much that she gave up her day job in order to give it her full energy and attention; and still very much enjoys to this day.
She has had many other professional roles; previous jobs have included accountancy, project management, various management roles within charities and the NHS and massage therapy… which she still practices; only with a very naughty twist….. 😉
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Naughty New Year Memories

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So it’s nearly 2013 already! How on earth did that happen!?  It really doesn’t feel like 2000 was that long ago. I remember my then boyfriend (and very first love) and I were determined to mark the occasion by doing something ‘special’ 😉 We’d rented a house and travelled with a group of friends to stay in a very pretty village and were enjoying an extremely wild house party (I was only 19 at the time, I certainly can’t party like I used to!).

As the clock edged closer to midnight there was only one thing on our minds… so we snuck away from the party to find somewhere private with a lock and as the clock struck twelve my boyfriend was thrusting deep and hard into my warm, wet pussy. We returned to the party trying to look as innocent as possible; me with a cunt full of his warm cum gradually seeping through my knickers.

Unfortunately we hadn’t chosen our hide away particularly well – a bathroom above the room that every one else was partying in which had great acoustics… our friends had turned off the music to sing ‘auld lang syne’ and their singing efforts had been accompanied by my enthusiastic moans…. Ooops! Not very clever of us but I’m still very pleased to say that the first thing I experienced at the start of the millennium was a nice hard cock inside me!

Now, when you sing ‘auld lang syne’ this year I do hope that you’ll think of me!  This years New Years for me is going to be much more grown up and sedate and will involve close friends rather than cocks (not that I won’t be thinking of them!) but I’m looking forward to it. I hope that you have a very enjoyable New Years Celebration, whatever you decide to do and that 2013 is very good year for you 🙂 xxxxxx
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Have yourself a Merry Little Christmas xxxx

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Well here it is! Nearly another end to another year and in this Christmas month I have been given some very lovely Christmas kisses (amongst, of course far ruder things!); and I didn’t even get around to buying any mistle toe… cheap joke, I know, I’m sorry but I couldn’t resist it! I also got to see the lovely Amy ‘of Scarborough’ (check my lovely ladies blog page) this week, which is always a pleasure.

This time of year often finds me in a reflective mood and I feel very fortunate to say that 2012 has been a good one for me, I hope that it has been for you too; and if not that 2013 is better.

I’m off for the next little while seeing friends and family to share the festive spirit; but I’ll be back on the 4th of January, looking forward to new naughty adventures 😉

If you fancy meeting up for New Years treats please do email me but don’t be dismayed if it takes me a little while to answer, I will, as soon as I can, I promise.

Thank you to all the wonderful ladies and gentleman who have made this year so special for me xxxx

So that’s me, signing off for Christmas with just one last thing to say….

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z_m6HrCNJjI